As time goes on...

I feel a little less confident about my amenorrhea being over. Not loads less, but a little. Time allows your mind to wander, to ponder the possibilities, and of course to worry. I imagine that the waiting to see if you're pregnant is a lot more nerve racking, though the bonus there is it's waiting for something good rather than fearing something bad. But the kicker in either case is that there is nothing you can do but let the days trickle by. I should be into cycle week three and having a period two weekends from now or so if we're truly back on track. I couldn't convince Bonzo to forget about the hormonal balance month crap so no actual trying for us this month and, thus, very unlikely to be a pregnancy. The thing is part of the reason I wanted to try this month was to hide from the fact that maybe I won't be regular for another several months. Not that us trying would help with that for long because I might get hopeful when I "missed" a period but we would find out pretty quickly, as we did in February, that the "missing" had nothing to do with pregnancy and everything to do with hormonal screw ups. It would give me an extra little bit of time to avoid the reality, though. Silly, silly, silly but who can be rational about this all the time? Another seven months is a long time. Sigh.